With Nutter’s proposed “cost cutting decisions” like closing down 11 Philly libraries and consolidating city fire departments making headlines ever since I returned to the Cradle of Liberty, I’m at least glad to hear that there’s a stay of execution on the libraries – for now.

Still, it would be nice to hear that same will be said about our local fire departments. So, I’ve come up with two ideas to show Nutter that downsizing these engines would be a bad idea:

1. Burn down a library. How deliciously ironic. Especially if the library is a) one of the 11 that may be closed and b) near a fire department that’s getting axed.

Cons: Illegal, I’d never do it, nor do I condone anyone else doing it.

2. Go to the fire department, ask for “War & Peace”. Keep doing every single day.

Cons: Pissing off Philly firefighters might not be a good idea, who realistically wants to read “War & Peace” except to brag about it?

Maybe the City would have a little bit more in their coffers if some idiots at City Hall weren’t being paid $90,000 a year:

Yeah.

- AP

Officials from the Mummers left the Mummers Museum last night after agreeing to sign a contract with the city to stage this year’s parade. New Year’s parade time cut in accordance with $300K budget. (Photo: Rikard Larma/Metro)

Our annual Mummers Parade is a go this year. Which is great – because how idiotic would we look if we axed the Mummers Parade? Ever hear of the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade getting shut down..or the boring ass Rose Parade?

It’s going to be a shortened parade this year, though.

Which makes me wonder: I thought the city itself made in excess of $20 million from the World Series.

Where did the $20 million go?

Budget crisis my ass. Maybe if Mayor Michael “The Honeymoon Is Over” Nutter wasn’t lazy, he’d actually go through the budget and find all the money the City is wasting on stupid stuff. Or he could take the “bail me out, please” route and just go beg Obama for the money. Yes he can.

TIP: It’s good to ask someone from the Illinois political machine a favor on their daughter’s wedding day

We should have nice things in the greatest City in the world. Like Mummers parades, libraries, and fire departments.

- AP

P.S. You can help the Mummers out by visting Savethemummers.com.

Luckily, everyone isn’t on board:

Click HERE to help out.

(Thanks to Is This Life? for the link….)

Foxwoods wants to build a casino at The Gallery. Some people are opposed to it because of the je ne sais quoi that a casino might bring to the area – like traffic.

Other people are opposed to the casino because of the “shady elements” and “crime” and “prostitution” that a casino “would bring” to the area. That reason always make me chuckle because – if I recall from my eleventeen years – isn’t Chinatown the place where kids go to get fake ID’s and nunchucks and chewing gum that gets you high?

Still others are are opposed to the casino, for, well, batsh*t crazy reasons.

From my peeps at Fox 29…

Yeah, I wish I was making that up. According to this chick, the Foxwoods business model looks a little something like this:

1. Destroy Asian community under the guise of Pai Gow poker and loose slots

2. ???

3. Profit.

I understand the trials and tribulations of wanting to build ANYTHING anywhere in a city that’s cramped for space. I understand it’s not as easy a deal as Harrah’s had – all they had to do was build in Chester, where only like 5 people live and it was quite easy to simply build a casino directly across from a federal “pound me in the ass” prison. I understand that words like gentrification get thrown around in major cities like everyone is trying to emulate that one dude’s speech in “Chasing Amy“.

I’s in yer nayborhood, steelin yer moneyz

But..seriously? Really? The reason they want to build in Chinatown is to specifically target the community there and destroy it?!

Yeah – it’s not because the casino would be in a prime location or anything. It’s not like putting a casino right in the heart of Philadelphia would be a great idea. It’s also not like Foxwoods is also thinking of the Delaware Riverfront as an alternate location. I guess Foxwoods has a plan to gentrify really lame night clubbers, too.

They totally want to take advantage of people who will “like the casino a little too much”.

*rolls eyes*

Just build the damn thing so the city can take the revenue and reopen the rec centers and libraries that Mayor Nutcase is shutting down.

Be seeing you,

- AP

I’d first like to tip my hat to Frazgo over at Los Angeles Metblogs for getting the hook up for me here at Philadelphia Metblogs.

My name’s Aaron Proctor. Otherwise/formerly known as “The Noticeable One“, “The Proc“, or “The Most Electrifying Man In Pasadena” and generally known as a damned handsome man. I like long walks on the beach, “Arrested Development“, corporate slang, vodka tonics and house cats that sound like they’re meowing with a “Brrrrrrrowww” instead of Meow. You know what I’m sayin’?

I moved back to the Philly burbs – Delaware County, right in the Chichester area – after living in Los Angeles for the past eight years. You can read about my exploits, triumphs and tribulations in Los Angeles by going here. It’s wiki-accurate.

I grew up in various parts of the Philly area. Was born in Chester. Moved to Mt. Airy to attend the first part of grade school. Moved back to Chester for a short period of time up until around 5th grade and then I finished out my middle and high school experience in the Marcus Hook/Lower Chichester/Upper Chichester area.

I headed to Los Angeles (well, Pasadena, it’s pretty much the same thing but…shhhhh…don’t tell them that or some Caltech kid will throw a thorny Rose at you) eight years ago with an eyeliner-smeared face and a liberal heart and ended up moving back with a v-neck sweater & collared shirt with a conservative head. And since I’m a Republican AND a cigarette smoker, it’s nice to be in an area where I’m not quite a fifth-class citizen. (You know, I really wish there was a “cut and paste” option for real life so that I can always add ‘but I don’t hate gays and don’t mind abortion..I’m a libertarian with a lower case l’).

I ran for Mayor Pasadena back in 2007 and got 11.2% of the vote. In a leather jacket. While wearing eyeliner. How California is that!? Soon enough, I didn’t forget my roots and took a bit of Philly with me. After deciding that being 25, balding, and a Goth socialist wasn’t cutting it, I did a complete 180 and started a somewhat-hilarious, mostly-acerbic, profanity-laced Conservative blog. It was a hit (well, it got a lot of hits – and e-mail from angry Councilmembers) in Pasadena as it equally angered and offended the same amount of people as it made spit out their morning lattes in laughter. I got a writing gig at a local paper (The Pasadena Weekly) – who pretty much gave me ink for shock value (controversial character = cash?) but then, for some reason, only gave me fluff stories to write. I did get to meet my hero, Huell Howser, however.

One thing lead to another, I pushed the envelope too far (people in Los Angeles don’t have a sense of humor and will be quick to call a lawyer or the police even if you make an unharmful WWE-style video challenging a newspaper publisher to a wrestling match) – and I came back to the Philly area after being fired and finding out my parents needed some assistance with their living situation.

Getting adjusted back to life in Delco has been really fun, really enjoyable. You know, to me, the Philadelphia area is truly the greatest metropolitan area in the whole wide world. One doesn’t appreciate the luxuries – both in terms of Tastykakes and peoples’ attitudes – until one lives in plastic-fake-boob-perfect-teeth Los Angeles for nearly a decade. I feel like a lot of people don’t appreciate it here. “Oh, the weather sucks”, “Oh, our sports teams suck”, “Oh, this place sucks, “You’ll get sick of it here”, “Why in the world would you leave CALIFORNIA?” – it’s something I’ve heard a multitude of times. Let me tell you something from my own perspective – the LA area ain’t that great of a place to live these days unless you’ve got a lot of money and are super progressive. Philly has its own charm, an incomparable state of mind and being and something unmatched by any other metropolitan area (and I’ve been to 26 of these great United States AND Washington DC) anywhere else. Other cities should be quite envious of how unique, fun, and awesome Philly has remained in a country full of carbon-copy “up and on the move” cities.

The differences between Delaware County and Philly itself are even more striking. I’m not even an hour from Center City and it can feel like I’m world’s away when I take the R2 into the City. It’s a nice compare and contrast of suburban and urban lifestyles – blue collars vs white collars – and all that Lebanon baloney.

Man, did I sure miss Wawa. And Turkey Hill ice cream and iced tea. And cheaper cigarettes – WAIT A MINUTE – why are cigs more expensive here, even in Delaware County, than in California? Guess I gotta go down to Bidenware and stock up. Oh..what else did I miss? Pathmark. SEPTA. Die hard sports fans. The whole “Philly attitude”.

Especially the latter. People here are sometimes rude, crude, in your face, and – especially in Delaware County – often just look haggard or harsh. I love it! It’s more honest, it’s more real, and by gawd, I’d rather have that than whatever is going on over in Hollyweird. And…the Phillies won the World Series. That was just the icing on the cake, considering I moved out here during the middle of the NLCS and was getting peanuts thrown at me every time I went to a bar. Yeah, peanuts. Los Angeles fans aren’t that tough.

Being gone for a while has also led me to make some prolific and poignant observations. I’ve decided to put together some of the things I’ve either said to myself or shouted out loud into a Top Ten List, a/la David Letterman (one of my heroes). Submitted, for your approval….:

TOP TEN THINGS I’VE BEEN OVERHEARD SAYING SINCE MY MOVE BACK TO PHILLY

10. “Damn, Dawn Stensland is pretty hot.”

9. “Hearing it pronounced ‘wooder‘ sounds more annoying than it did eight years ago.”

8. “Sweet Yuengling. Nectar of the gods.”

7. “The bus fare is how much?!”

6. “Oh, Dawn, you just made that triple homicide sound so f’n HOT!”

5. “LOL. Eight-Twelve. That never gets old.”

4. “Yeah, that’s a California ID. No, it’s not fake.”

3. “Where’s that UN—CLAIMED—-FREIGHT! guy?”

2. “I’d like to form an exploratory committee into Dawn Stensland’s pants.”

1. “I live in Delaware County, not Delaware.”

Over the next few weeks and months, I’d like to share my Phil-adjustments with the rest of you. Since I don’t own a car and work in retail now (yep – the mighty have fallen!), I have yet to discover or re-discover some of the awesomeness I left behind 8 years ago and want to share those adventures with you, the reader, for the low, low price of $19.99 plus shipping and handling. Operators are standing by.

Be seeing you.

- AP

Friends of the Free Library have posted about several meetings and rallies to help save the library, and will be holding a press conference at 12 noon on Monday (November 17) in front of the Haddington Library branch. The website also lists steps you can take if you would like to participate or donate.

The Kingsessing branch has started its own blog, Save Kingsessing Library! They are holding their own rally tomorrow, rain or shine, at 2 p.m. in the meeting room.

More news as it develops!

This Saturday, across the country, protest rallies will be held to repeal Prop 8. The Philadelphia rally will be held at Dilworth Plaza at City Hall, starting at 1:30pm. Join the Impact is hosting the event, and you can share the info or RSVP for the rally through the Facebook group.

On a personal note, I am totally against marriage bans of any sort, and believe it would be a lot easier to completely change the way “marriage” is perceived instead of writing laws allowing or banning one thing or another. I think of marriage as a personal, religious, or spiritual title, that is altogether separate from civil unions. If two people—male, female, or otherwise—want to enter into a legal union, who are we to stop them? It would be unconstitutional.

But then, that’s the beauty of the peaceful protest! If you don’t like the way something is done (or not done) then work to change it!

I voted this morning around 11:30am, before I left for work. Since I moved back to South Philly recently, I had to show my ID for voting in my new district. Total time at my polling place: 4 minutes.

How are the lines near you? Did you wait hours to vote? Were you one of many lining up well before the 7am open times? Will you just sneak in before they close at 8pm?

Google Maps offers a customized map for US voters looking for their polling locations; just enter your home address and it will show you your place.

If you need more information than the address of your polls, check out the following sites for ballot information, candidates, resources, voter rights, and more:

• Committee of Seventy
• Votes PA
• SmartVoter’s PA page

So make sure you get out there on Tuesday and vote for the right candidate, and not that other guy.

While Obama overwhelmingly won the support of Philadelphians (65% to Clinton’s 35%), Clinton proved that she is the clear choice for Pennsylvanians state-wide. Being a huge supporter of Senator Clinton, I listened intently to her victory speech last night. She said one thing that really stuck in my mind (not verbatim), “…I’ve seen parent’s with their daughters saying – See? You can be anything you want to be.”

On an even more local level, Larry Farnese won the 1st District Senate Seat – proudly representing South Philadelphia. While I voted for Anne Dicker, I was very satisfied that union boss John Dougherty did not clinch the victory. Dougherty also “killed” more trees then Farnese and Dicker – and if anyone knows, I am all about greening South Philadelphia.