Archive for March, 2008

Phillies open today!

And boom baby…like thunder clouds rolling across the plains…the 2008 baseball season is upon us. If only it was sunny…but no, nothing is perfect. Today at 3pm, a little less than an hour from this WORD the Phillies kick off their 2008 season, a hardened defense of the NL East crown. Brett Myers takes the mound against Those Bastards from the South, who last night beat the Braves in their brand spankin’ new ballpark. Only DRob is happy.

And he is very happy.

Let’s just hope that the Fightin’ Phils don’t start of the season like they did last year, or worse…like how Team GFY started their season yesterday under a crisp spring sun out in the burbs.

Who was thatteam? Some Ale House from out near White Marsh and they completely whipped the floor with Team GFY, a bunch of young, eager beavers looking to make their mark in whatever league it was that they happened to be playing in. No Scream’ Jay, he was out of town. And Eddy’s Ice Cream was not around either. The team looked mildly optimistic despite the setbacks…but then the G D game started and it really kind of went down hill from there. The monsters on the Ale House team sent beleaguered softball after softball out deep into the outfield and their ladies – all properly equipped with visors and hats – made GFY’s male players look like they had picked a fight with a polar bear instead of a lifeless manatee.

No good!

Rocket E did her best to quel the offensive firepower and if there were any glimmers of hope for GFY, the team’s defense did as well as a team that loses 19-0 can do. Jables at short stop and El Grande Blanco at the hot corner challenged Jose and Ozzie Canseco as the best brother duo to command a diamond and out in left, DRob – not yet happy about the Nats’ win – displayed mostly text book form…mostly. A few hot dogging plays and it seemed to get the best of him, but hey, this team is working out the kinks, baby! Kinks! By next week, only a few kinks and the week after that…maybe only one or two!

But you know as far as offense goes, as potent as the Fightin’ Phils offense is, GFY’s was as sterile as a newborn. But yes, there was the one time when Katie made it to third, a cause for great celebration – and other notable efforts were made by Nailz, Knife Fight…and Gerard. But hey, at least G has the hip hop thing to fall back on.

A little after 2, the game came to an end when the Slaughter rule was tossed. No worries. I think the hour was almost up anyway and all of the crazy Gladiators had better places to be…like neighboring bars with neighboring deals on wings and pitchers of beer.

Now a rainy, dreary Monday but who cares because it’s Opening Day! Only a half hour to make it home.

Run, baby, run…

Here’s to the Phils’ in ’08!

April showers, mark your calendars!

I’ve been all work, all the time lately, and the weeks are just flying by. It’s sad, really. I need to slow down. But no time for that! I’m leaving Philly for Milan and London, for very important businessy business, in oh, about 9 days, and here are some April things I hope to do and will also miss while I’m away:

1. Philadelphia Film Festival: April 3-15. There are complimentary guides around town. I’m sure you can pick them up at any Ritz theater, the Prince Music Theater, The Bridge: Cinema DeLux, International House, and the Bryn Mawr Film Institute – all venues for the films. TLA stores are selling advance tickets already.

2. April 5 – Philly Spring Cleanup. Join me!

3. April 12 – Roller Derby Double Header at the Sportsplex in NE Philly. $10 advance purchase, $12 at the door. Never seen them; have always wanted to be one – a tough bitch on wheels. I’ll have to watch. They would kill me, I suppose.

4. April 15 – Deadline for filing 2007 income tax returns. Yay.

5. April 15 – reward your possibly last-minute scramble to file the taxes with a Phillies home game. It’s Hatfield Phillies Franks Dollar Dog Night! Get yourself some cheap weiners and expensive booze.

6. April 18-20th – Philadelphia Tattoo Arts Convention, Sheraton Philadelphia City Center Hotel. $15 per day, $35 for the weekend. Get marked!

7. April 22 – Pennsylvania 2008 General Election Primaries. 7am-8pm. Here’s a handy guide to finding your polling place. Rock it!

Here’s wishing you a sweet April!

Obama for Pop Culture Icon!

Are you ready?

Are you?

Are you ready for Barack Obama – pop culture icon?

If your not, then that’s tough business for you because it’s in the process of happening right NOW. See the new posters at all the bus stops around the city, a rough, gray-toned drawing of Obama with a single word describing his campaign.

“Hope”

“Change”

“Kick Assness”

It’s a bold move by the Obama campaign if you were to ask this wandering dude. Are we to now assume that Senator Obama from Illinois has reached that status of celebrity where no name is needed? I think of pictures of Martin Luther King Jr., Che Guerra, Britney Spears, where the name of the person is arbitrary because we already know who it is.  Is that Obama now? Is he beyond a name now? A few months ago most of the country only knew the name “Barack Obama.” Now I suppose everyone not only knows his name, but his face as well.

So that’s that. Barack might not be President, but he’s a pop culture icon. So he’s got that going for him…which is nice…and probably more profitable.

Barack!

Cherry Blossom Time

The cherry blossoms have started opening, just in time for the Subaru Cherry Blossom Festival. Lots of events are scheduled throughout April. See http://www.jasgp.org/cherryblossomfestival/

sakura-sunrise.jpg

Phillies, rock and roll, and Hill Dog…

Fun times here in sunny Philadelphia, waiting for Erin to come by so we can go look at Ben Franklin’s house and maybe the Liberty Bell…all while the clock ticks closer and closer to the Final Four, the start of the baseball season, Team GFY’s first game of the season, and tax season to wind down. Tick, tick, tick. Fun times.

The politicians are running wild across the state like lost cattle, begging you and hassling you for your votes. Are you a Democrat? Do you like long walks on the beach…maybe some Chinese food? Does it matter? Sure it does. Chelsea Clinton would NOT be here if it didn’t, but then Patrick Leahy from Vermont comes out and just tells Hill Dog that maybe it’s time to go home and for the Clinton camp, NOT fun times.

But we’re good, God-fearing Americans, and for the rest of us, these are good times. The Phillies unofficially start the 2008 season this weekend in a couple exhibition games versus the Toronto Blue Jays. Then Monday, the home opener, the start of the campaign to defend their 2007 NL East crown versus those bastards from the south, the Washington Nationals and we all just wish they would go away.

The season is looking promising for our Fightin’ Phils and the offense could very easily score 3,000 runs, which they’ll need too given that the pitching staff might give up 2,999 runs. And yes, 2,000 of those runs probably will come from our lovable, over-paid 5th starter, Adam Eaton and his GD goatee that probably scares more children than a nurturing Hill Dog does. Cole Hamels and Brett Myers anchor the rotation, rounded out by Kyle Kendrick and Jamie Moyer, who at 44, is proving that the love of the game is as addictive as buffalo wings are too…Hill Dog. Sorry. I think I like Hill Dog, but I also think I don’t. Whatever. You don’t care about my opinions.

But if you did, and you wanted to know what kind of line-up I’d throw up there if I were good ol’ Charlie Manuel, it would go something like this…

1. JRooooll
2. Svic
3. Big Ry
4. The Force That is Chase
5. Pat Burrell
6. Pedro Feliz/the Dobbserman
7. Geoff Jenkins/Jayson Werth/So Taguchi
8. Carlos Ruiz
9. pitcher

But it probably won’t be that way, and that’s cool.

You know what else is cool? Rock shows at the World Cafe live and this Tuesday, there is a hell of a rock show featuring Rustic Overtones. Rustic is a 7 piece rock/funk/soul band signed to Velour (Soulive, Kaki King) who recently released their new album, Light at the End. Check out Rustic at www.myspace.com/rusticovertones. The show is Tuesday April 1st, downstairs at World Cafe. Big fun promised, big fun guaranteed.

Let’s go Davidson, valiant run ‘Nova, better luck next year Temple…

Favorite Philly graffiti?

I just had a really nice time at Skinner’s, and was reminded that I wanted to ask you, sweet readers: where have you seen/what is your favorite graffiti? I just really like the simple stuff. “I’m gay for Holly” and “Maggie doesn’t wipe” – well, those just crack me up to no end. I know there’s good stuff at Sugar Mom’s, but, well, I haven’t been everywhere, so fill me in. Where is the good stuff?

A request.

Dear commuters who share a car, train, bus, subway or trolley with others,

Brush your teeth before you leave in the morning. Maybe even throw in a little mouth wash. No on wants to smell your nasty bacteria-laden stankbreath. This goes double for those who also share offices or cubicles in close proximity.

Thank you.

Because April is boring…

With Easter over, I began thinking, “when is the next major holiday?” Not in the near future, I can tell you. SO, I’ve searched far and wide for some excuses to celebrate. 1. First notable thing to do in Philly in April is to join the Philly Spring Clean-up. That should count as a Philly homestyle holiday. 2. Here is a list of April “holidays.” My favorite is Earth Day, April 22. Some of these are quite silly. Let me tell you that if the mail is delivered, it’s not a REAL holiday.

Lastly, I would like to remind you, Philadelphians, to look up. The cherry trees are blooming. The birds are chirping. And for today, the sun is shining! I don’t know how many times I’ve seen some piece of architecture I never noticed before, because I simply look up. I was reminded of this last weekend, when I was approaching the city from the east, Penn’s Landing, and only just noticed 2 new tall buildings along Front Street (which have probably been there for a while)! On top of that, there’s all this buzz about a new tall, tallest building, the American Commerce Center. Check it out!

Studio 34 Grand Opening Week

This week marks the opening of a new arts and wellness community center in West Philly called Studio 34, so named for its convenient location on the Rt 34 trolley.

According to their website:

Studio 34 serves as a hub, both online and onsite, for healing, art and wellness information. We want people to be well—period. We collaborate with other healing and arts organizations, including practitioners of eastern and western medicine, to host workshops in several healing arts, music and creative arts events, support groups, and community meetings.

To celebrate, many yoga and pilates classes this week (March 22-29) are free! The grand opening party is Saturday, March 29 from 7-11 p.m. with live music from the Citywide Specials and Walt Bibinger with Jessi Teich.

I’m looking for funny bonnets

Does God care what you wear? I will be out and about to see what other people think they should be wearing to celebrate Easter. There is some sort of Easter-fashion-wear-your-bonnet parade/contest in Headhouse Square (2nd & Pine) on Sunday, March 23, from 1-3. Since I don’t really give a flying you-know-what about religious holidays, I will be going to people-watch. It sounds fun, and if you are religious, you can partake in this fashion show/contest! I think I read a mention of drag queens in the City Paper. Here is the real information.

Furthermore, if you want to play Halloween on Easter, you can just go drinking, dressed as a zombie. Thanks, as always, City Paper!

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