Time to Man Up: Phils cap off important 10 game homestand TONIGHT

Sorry Philly for the absence…the lack of postings. I decided to check out global warming for myself and headed north…but I got the lost, ended up watching scores of women’s basketball, and setting off fireworks.

Really just all in a day’s work.

Moving on.

It’s Go Time, baby!!! Are you ready? Can you feel it? It’s make or break time for our Fightin’ Phils and this week could very well be the week that either sends the team coasting comfortably like Prom Kings into September or limping miserably like El Grande Blanco after a rough day in Atlantic City. Here come the contenders…the Dodgers, the Padres, the Mets. They’re all coming to town. They’re coming with guns drawn and prickly attitudes. Currently the Phillies are hanging on, trailing the Mets by 5 games in the NL East and only 1 game behind the Padres in the NL Wild Card. The Dodgers, who are in town tonight, are just 1.5 games behind the Phils. This is intense. This is borderline bedlam!

Is it?

Well, the Eagles are in the middle of preseason and Donovan McNabb has successfully galluped through a couple meaningless…yes MEANINGLESS…preseason games….

Right now, we shouldn’t care about football. Don’t let this recent spade of bad weather fool you. It’s not football season yet. There is no need for Eagles chants and nonstop Eagles chatter on the clogged and congested AM airwaves. The Fightin’ Phils are still alive, kicking their way through adversity like Daniel Son and Kevin Costner in Waterworld COMBINED. No The Force That is Chase. No speedy Shane or speedier Bourn Outstanding. Really the only good news involving the Disabled List is Adam Eaton’s name on it. But it seems like he’d be able to lose a game sitting in the trainer’s room, stroking his goatee he stole from Murray from Flight of the Conchords.

But Chase is coming back! He got the okay! Dude’s out there swinging the bat and the word on the street is that he could be back in the lineup for the Mets series. Sleep soundly Philly. Your man, Pat Burrell will no longer have to bat third. Everything will be right again.

But will that be too late?

By next week, the Phils could still be in the thick of things, but they need to man up before the weekend. The Dodgers, stumbling along like hungover Stiflers, are still a dangerous team and the Padres would be atop the NL West if not for the Diamondbacks, who somehow keep winning games, despite scoring negative runs. My suspicion is that they are all remarkable conmen…

So Philly…don’t get down. This weather won’t last and the rain was good for us. It was good for our plants and good for our cars. Tomorrow, the sun is coming back out, the temperature is heading back up north to the 90’s, and the Phillies are home for the next week in what is the most important homestand of the season. I know it’s fun to spell the word Eagles and drool over McNabb, but those bastards can wait. It’s baseball season.

Act accordingly.

If nothing else, do it for Adam Eaton. He’s an overweight, ineffective pitcher with a bad goatee.

He needs all the help he can get.

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